So in this box is your very own Red Dress Story waiting to happen. But there are a few things you’ll want to know:
- This Traveling Red Dress comes in pieces. A skirt and a top.
- The top is available in three basic sizes. The smaller of the two red ones is about a 6, the black one is about a 12, and the other red one is about an 18. One of them should fit you just fine.
- You probably won’t be able to get into this thing by yourself. So, ring the bell for your manservant, call a friend, or purchase a helper monkey and lay in a stock of bananas.
Starring, The Stig*
*If you're not a fan of Top Gear, you probably think The Stig is a typo. You're wrong. The Stig is awesome.
|1. The skirt is one long piece that will wrap around you and tie in the
There is more than enough skirt to go around, so some people will have overlap.
That’s okay! The fluffier the better, that’s my motto
|If you are on the smaller end |
of the size spectrum, like The Stig,
you may want to wrap the skirt
more around your ribs, like this.
|If you are on the larger end, |
you’ll probably find the top more
comfortable with the skirt lower,
around your waist or hips, like this.
|2. There are two wide slits in the waistband of the skirt. |
If you are wrapping it around more than once, feed the
end through one of the slits so you can keep wrapping.
|If you’re extra little, you may even have to use the second slit to |
come around again. Play with it a little bit.